girloliphaunt | (no subject)

This is me at halloween. I look fabulous don't I :)

And this is my beloved Two. ::giggles:: We got matching costumes.

This is from when I clubbed Two over the head with a vase, after he arrived home late, and I handcuffed him and left him in the bath. He does the pleading to be freed look very well.

::giggles:: I had Two arrested for fun. ehehehe For our 2 week anniversary.

I'm so huge. HUGE. AND FAT.

Look, isn't Two sooo cute? Our baby will be so cute. ::nods:: Even cuter. :D

This is me wearing the oliphaunt national costume. I had to adjust it a bit. Seeing as I don't look much like an oliphaunt any more.

Two took this one. He was teaching me the correct way to remove someone's kidney whilst scantily clad.

Two says this is why he likes me. He didn't say he loved me. I feel so unloved. ::weeps::

I am so fat.
That's my doctor. He's cute.

This is me and my auntie agatha. My family say that I look like her. Can you see the resemblance?

This is me. And my make up consultant. He's so cute.

This is me and my dentist. He's so cute.

He's really a very good dentist.

I have no fillings.

The last time I attacked Two with sharp objects I hired some nurses to help me look after him. We had a lot of fun. :)

This was taken the week we first got together. ::giggles:: I made him dress as me.

My fashion consultants. They really are very good. and cute.

I locked Two in the shower for a week. He's so cute. But I had to punish him for what he did to his hair.

Me and Two. okay. so you can't really see me. Two likes this picture.

The time I threw Two out the top floor window. ::giggles:: This is after he landed.

Right before he tried to drown me and steal my lungs.

This was when we went to Rohan. Such a pretty horse.

He was cute then too. :)

So cute.

Two. Look. I'M WEARING A WEDDING DRESS. ::weeps::

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Marry me.

::weeps::

REALLY? Oh yes!!!!!
WOwOWOWOwOWOW

mhm. Really. Look, I even have a ring. *slips it on your finger*

::SMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOCH::

::inspects ring::

Is this diamond real?

~~I'd tell you to ask the guy I stole it from, but I've already pretty much emptied him of his vitals.~~ Yes.

~~did you save some for dinner?~~
aw. ::gropes::

~~intestine sausages are in the fridge, luv~~
heheh. *fondles*

~~mmmmm do you want some?~~

::pounce::

::giggles:: I think I'm getting a little... *ahem* too round for pouncing...

~~I'd love some.~~

But you still look beautiful. Or something. I'm gunna go get drunk.

you can't get drunk nooooooooow. without meeeeeeeee.

I'm HORNY DAMMIT!.

::lick::

well I'm gunna.

YOU'RE ALWAYS HORNY. I'm horny when i'm drunk, and I'm halfway there. So lemme finish.

*grope*

But then you fall asleep dammit and snore

I'm going to Isidur's secret.

(no subject)

you are too friendly with your dentist.

my dentist doesn't neglect <strike>me</strike>my teeth

neither does your makeup consultant. or your fashion consultants.

Sandy, the makeup guy, is very bendy::giggles:: Those nurses were cute too.

and bendy. we should bring them on our honeymoon. y'know. in case I get sick.

my dentist is very bendy too. maybe we should bring him. to you know... look after our teeth

hm. alright.

they're not as bendy as me. or as cute as you. ::smooch::

true. and aww. <3

Re: true. and aww. <3

Re: true. and aww. <3

Re: true. and aww. <3